(Kampala) – As the rest of Kampala was dreaming of Rolexes and Matooke, a certain group of individuals had other plans in the wee hours of August 22, 2024 —plans that went as smoothly as a boda-boda ride through potholes. Armed with nothing more than a hammer and questionable judgment, this gang decided to pay an uninvited visit to one Arinaitwe Mackline, a student of Victoria University, at her home in Nabulagala Zone, Rubaga Division.
Now, in a country where the hammer is usually reserved for building things (or breaking groundnuts), these assailants had a different idea. They crashed into Mackline’s home, brandishing their hammer like it was the latest tool from the Jua Kali market, ready to cause trouble. They didn’t just stop at invading her space; they assaulted her, snatched her laptop, mobile phone, and academic transcripts—because, apparently, these days even thieves need to check your grades.
Mackline, however, wasn’t about to let her hard earned belongings disappear without a fight. She resisted, and like any true Ugandan heroine, she made sure the robbers had to work for their loot. Unfortunately, bravery doesn’t always come without a cost, and she sustained injuries during the scuffle. But here’s where the robbers’ plan started to unravel faster than a cheap gomesi during a kwanjula.
As they made their not so great escape, perhaps thinking they had outsmarted the world, they ran smack into a police patrol team from Old Kampala Police Station. You can almost hear the thieves’ hearts sink—like the sound of a hammer hitting an empty tin—when they realized their getaway plan was about to be as successful as trying to eat hot katogo without blowing on it first.
The Not So-Smart Move: Trying to Outrun Kampala Police
Leading the pack was one Mayanja Hassan, a 32 year-old Kisenyi resident who might have thought he was the next big thing in Kampala’s criminal underworld. Spoiler alert: he wasn’t. The police didn’t just arrest him; they also found him with the very hammer he had used to terrorize Mackline, as well as all the stolen items. It was like catching a fish with the bait still in its mouth—too easy.
In a move that can only be described as “Ngenda kuswala” (I’m about to be embarrassed), Mayanja decided to cooperate with the police, leading them to his fellow gang members. One can imagine the conversations in the cells: “Eh, naye Mayanja, you betrayed us! You even gave them the hammer?”
The Ugandan Police Force must have had a field day with this one. After all, how often does a criminal hand them everything on a silver platter—including the weapon of choice? It’s not every day that you get to arrest a suspect and recover all the stolen goods in one fell encounter. It’s the kind of efficiency that would make even Kampala’s notorious traffic enforcers jealous.
The lesson here is simple: if you’re going to rob someone, maybe don’t do it with a hammer, and definitely don’t try to outrun a police patrol in the dead of night. Kampala’s streets may be chaotic, but one thing’s for sure—when the police are on your trail, no amount of hammers can save you. Just ask Mayanja, who now has plenty of time to think about his choices behind bars.
