The once-exiled tweetstorm emperor has stormed back to his throne – yes, I’m talking about none other than the Trumpinator himself! Former President Donald Trump has strutted his way back onto the battleground of 280-character mayhem, as he returns to the virtual birdhouse known as X, or, as our grandparents remember it, “Twitter.”
Like a phoenix rising from the ashes of political exile, Trump graced our screens last night with a mugshot that screamed, “I’m back, baby!” The caption? Oh, just a casual “ELECTION INTERFERENCE, NEVER SURRENDER!” Just the kind of humble reentry you’d expect from a man who surrendered to the authorities earlier that day in Atlanta. Who says a mugshot can’t be a fashion statement?
Blink, and you might’ve missed it: within the time it takes to binge-watch a couple of sitcom episodes, Trump’s post racked up more action than a soap opera cliffhanger. This epic shot garnered a jaw-dropping 485,000 likes, 142,000 retweets (or reposts, as the kids call it), and 47,300 times people quoted it. The internet sure missed his unique brand of emojis and exclamation marks.
Remember the Capitol riot saga of January 6, 2021? That’s the sticky wicket that got Trump a one-way ticket to Banville. Well, fast forward to 2022, and who swoops in like a digital superhero to lift the ban? Elon “I Put the ‘Tweet’ in ‘Sweet'” Musk! Yep, he, the new bigwig in town, graciously gave Trump his virtual microphone back in November. But for a while, crickets… or rather, the sound of silence.
Now, ladies and gentlemen, let’s talk strategy. Our maverick maestro of memorable monologues, after just one day of hanging with Tucker Carlson on a digital sofa, decided, “Hey, why not time my return with the Republican primary debate?” So, here he is, like a knight in orange armor, gracing X with his virtual presence just in time to divert attention from policy debates to retweet rallies.
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Speaking of retweets, before the banhammer struck, Trump had a following that could fill a small country (86 million, to be exact). But let’s face it, the Twitterverse has a short memory. Now he’s back to square one with a fraction of that fanfare on his own digital playground, Truth Social. It’s like inviting the neighborhood to a block party and only the squirrels show up.
Fasten your seatbelts and keep those X fingers limber, because the Trump train has rolled back into station, bringing with it a mugshot manifesto and a vow to never surrender – unless it’s to the authorities for a quick photo op. And who said reality TV was dead?
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