In a shocking turn of events, the Electoral Commission has responded to recent claims by His Excellency President Yoweri Museveni, who hinted that NUP stole one million votes during the 2021 presidential election. Richard Baabo, Director of Operations at the EC, wasted no time in distancing the commission from any “missing” votes, adding a twist of humor to the nation’s political discourse.
At a dialogue hosted by Civil Society Organizations to discuss election-related conflict, Baabo took to the podium with a smirk, “Look, we’ve conducted countless elections, but one thing’s for sure, we’re not magicians. We can’t steal votes that don’t exist.”
Baabo went on to clarify that the Electoral Commission had combed through all the evidence provided, analyzed every ballot paper, and “interrogated every polling agent who had the unfortunate luck of staying awake through the tallying process.”
“I mean, one million votes? That’s quite a heist!” Baabo laughed, “If NUP really pulled off a theft of that magnitude, they should consider opening a bank, because clearly, we could all learn something from their tactics!”
He continued, poking fun at the absurdity of the situation. “We’ve checked under every table, in every ballot box, and even in the EC cafeteria. Trust me, those one million votes are nowhere to be found! Maybe they were stolen by an advanced team of election ninjas? Or perhaps they evaporated into thin air? Either way, we’re sure NUP had nothing to do with it. Unless, of course, they’re using invisible ink now.”
Baabo’s remarks were met with laughter from the audience, but not everyone found the situation amusing. A representative from the opposition was seen scribbling furiously in their notebook, while a government official at the back muttered, “Maybe we *should* hire those ninjas…”
As the dialogue continued, stakeholders emphasized the need for autonomous and independent institutions like the Electoral Commission to ensure free and fair elections. Baabo, however, couldn’t resist one last jab: “We’re all for fair elections, but let’s be honest – if we could lose a million votes without noticing, we’d probably lose our car keys too.”
The dialogue concluded on a lighter note, but questions about the integrity of Uganda’s electoral process continue to hang in the air like a badly timed election promise. Whether the missing million votes are real or a figment of political imagination remains to be seen, but one thing is certain! Richard Baabo just made elections a lot more entertaining.
