The traditional view of childlessness has typically focused on women. However, recent studies indicate men are increasingly facing involuntary childlessness, with many experiencing a deep sense of loss and regret. Male childlessness has grown, particularly among those with lower incomes, with countries such as Norway reporting stark disparities: 72% of men in the lowest income bracket are childless, compared to just 11% among high earners. This socioeconomic gap has widened significantly over recent decades.
One such individual is Robin Hadley, a technical photographer from Manchester, UK, who wanted to have children but faced obstacles due to economic pressures and relationship challenges. In his 30s, struggling with a mortgage and limited disposable income, Hadley found dating difficult. As friends became fathers, he felt a profound sense of exclusion. Inspired by his experience, Hadley began studying male childlessness, noting that factors beyond biological fertility, like timing, relationship choices, and economic stability, play substantial roles.
Hadley also observed that childless men rarely appear in fertility research, a gap he believes reflects a broader societal oversight. Through his research, he discovered that men who wanted children yet remained childless experienced disenfranchisement and an enduring sense of loss, describing it as a “missing piece” in their lives.
In the UK, the birth rate has dropped to a record low of 1.44 births per woman, reflecting a global pattern seen in countries like China, where population growth has stalled. Factors leading to this decline include increased “social infertility”—a phenomenon that transcends biological barriers, encompassing financial struggles and a changing view of family life. Sociologist Anna Rotkirch notes a shift from seeing children as a starting point to an endpoint in adulthood. Once foundational, family life has become a choice made only after other goals, such as career and financial stability, are achieved.
Table: Rates of Childlessness in Select Countries
| Country | Childlessness Rate |
|---|---|
| East Asia | ~30% |
| United Kingdom | 18% |
| Finland | High rates among wealthier women but particularly prevalent among low-income men |
In Finland, where child friendly policies are celebrated, wealthier women have more control over their fertility choices than low-income men, who struggle financially. The burden of childlessness is increasingly shifting toward men from disadvantaged backgrounds, who often delay family formation due to financial insecurity.
Demographer Bernice Kuang conducted research in the UK and found that younger people are growing less certain about wanting children, with financial insecurity being a critical factor. Among people aged 18-25, 15% now say they will never have children—a stark increase from previous generations. A common reason cited was their lower living standards compared to their parents and the struggle to achieve financial milestones, such as securing housing and stable employment.
The financial and social aspects affecting childless men also highlight what researchers call a “crisis of masculinity.” Sociologist Marcia Inhorn of Yale University has noted a “mating gap” where women, who increasingly outperform men academically, tend to seek partners of similar or higher socioeconomic status. Men from disadvantaged backgrounds are thus more likely to remain single and childless. Hadley himself acknowledges that he often felt “out of his league” when dating, in both intellectual and financial terms.
In European countries, men without higher education are the most affected by involuntary childlessness. This disparity is exacerbated by insufficient data on male fertility since most countries only record maternal fertility. A study in Norway shows that childlessness is highest among poorer men, a fact often overlooked due to the focus on female fertility data. Vincent Straub, a fertility researcher at the University of Oxford, believes men’s role in declining birth rates should receive more attention.
Beyond economic and educational divides, cultural shifts are influencing young men’s experiences. For example, Finland, which has reliable data on non-marital relationships, has seen a decline in long-term partnerships. Couples are more likely to separate before having children, a trend Straub attributes to social pressures, shifting gender roles, and lifestyle changes.
The situation in East Asia presents additional cultural challenges. In China, for instance, child-rearing responsibilities largely fall on women, leading many young women to reject parenthood. As Martha Bao, a human resources worker from Shanghai, explains, she and many of her female friends avoid the burden of motherhood in favor of independence.
Addressing declining birth rates may require reevaluating societal expectations and expanding fertility discussions to include men. Straub believes that supporting men as caregivers can provide health benefits, but cultural perceptions must first change. For instance, while one in three women in the EU takes a career break to care for children, only one in 100 men do the same.
Hadley suggests that understanding men’s fertility and the impact of childlessness on their health is essential. This information gap, along with male biological factors—such as the gradual decline in sperm quality after age 35—needs wider acknowledgment in public discourse.
Experts also point out that, despite not having children, many childless men contribute to society through “alloparenting”—a term for providing care to others’ children. Professor Rotkirch, a leading advocate of this perspective, highlights the importance of these caregivers in children’s lives. Many childless individuals engage in mentoring roles, such as a man Hadley interviewed who served as a surrogate grandfather for local children.
Expanding the concept of parenthood to include alloparenting could address social infertility and provide a way for childless individuals to find purpose and fulfillment. Society could better appreciate the diverse ways individuals impact younger generations by recognizing this contribution.
