(Kampala) – Unidentified intruders took their acrobatics to the next level, scaling the fence of Glory Church in Kawaala, Kampala’s never dull suburb. Clearly, these intruders believed that, like in our local proverbs, “when the cat’s away, the mice will play.” But little did they know, it wasn’t a cat they’d be dealing with – it was the four legged enforcer of the law.
The suspects, whose identities remain as mysterious as your neighborhood gossip’s source, made their way into the church office with the enthusiasm of a hyena at a leftover feast. Their prized catch? A computer. (Not a tithe box, luckily – they weren’t looking for holy blessings, just a monitor and CPU).
The Police Dog with a Degree in Investigation
While Kampala’s boda riders have a talent for leading passengers through shortcuts, this particular K9 had a talent for tracking down suspects. The dog sniffed out the trail with the precision of a traditional herbalist diagnosing a patient with “balongo” (twins).
Like a detective straight out of a Netflix thriller, the canine wasted no time in tracing the suspects. It led the police to the doorstep of none other than Kiz Tugume, a local resident with a suspiciously heavy bag of ‘blessings.’ The dog’s nose knew, and soon so did the detectives – this wasn’t your typical ‘man of God.’
| Details of the Case | Description |
|---|---|
| Location of Incident | Glory Church, Kawaala, Kampala |
| Stolen Items | Computer (Monitor & CPU) |
| Prime Suspect | Kiz Tugume |
| Assisting Officer | Police K9 Dog |
| Recovered Items | Stolen Computer from suspect’s bag |
Once the dog had done its job, the detectives took over. Like a Ugandan grandmother finding sugar where you thought you hid it, they conducted a search of Tugume’s residence. To nobody’s surprise, the stolen computer was tucked neatly inside his bag.
The exhibit was promptly recovered, and Tugume was escorted into police custody – perhaps for some personal time with a higher power, this time in the form of the law.
However, Tugume isn’t one to sin alone. His four mysterious roommates, possibly his partners in ‘prayer’ (or should we say in crime?), are currently on the run. Police are eager to catch them, but in true Kampala fashion, they’ve likely vanished as quickly as people flee the market at the sight of KCCA officers.
| Summary of Arrests | Details |
|---|---|
| Suspect Arrested | Kiz Tugume |
| Stolen Items Recovered | Computer (Monitor & CPU) |
| Roommates Involved | 4 (Still at large) |
| Current Custody | Tugume in police custody |
Mr Tugume is now contemplating his life choices from the cozy confines of his new residence (aka a police cell). In a country where thieves used to fear curses from shrines and witch doctors, it’s now the humble police dog that has become the instrument of justice. Kiz won’t be attending any church services for the foreseeable future.
